SmallBizResource Blog -- Women in Business

Wednesday's Woman: Smart Networking's Liz Lynch

Posted by Gayle Kesten Wednesday, Jan 28, 2009, 11:25 AM ET

Five minutes. That's how long Liz Lynch lasted at her first networking event. "But I knew I had to learn to network if I was going to succeed as an entrepreneur," she says.

And learn she did -- so much so that Lynch wrote a book on the topic and founded the Center for Networking Excellence.

Initially Lynch's goal was to gain visibility for the consulting business she started in 2000 to help media companies find new revenue streams. "Even though I was terrible at networking, what I'm really good at is strategy and process," she told me during an uplifting conversation. "I thought about how I could network in a smart way so I could maximize results and minimize efforts -- so I could get in and get out and get back to work. As a solo entrepreneur you have this balance of marketing yourself, but also doing the work that brings in the money."

What I appreciated most about Lynch's book, Smart Networking, is how truly instructional it is. She tells you what you need to think about, gives you the words you need to say, provides real examples of networking in play, and offers a plethora of practical yet effective tips to put you on the path to networking excellence. Read on for the highlights of our discussion, which includes how to get help without asking, networking fallacies, and how to last more than five minutes at your next networking event.

(By the way, I'm happy to pass on my copy of Smart Networking. Send me your email address; I'll gather them in my virtual hat and choose a winner in a few days.)

SBR: What does smart networking mean?
Lynch: At the end of the day, it's about doing things that are going to give you the biggest bang for buck. The concepts I talk about in the book are how to be really good at it in-person, and then to incorporate online networking. Also, another component is that networking is easier when people come to you, whether it's because you have a name for yourself or have expertise that people begin hearing about. When you can put your knowledge out there in speeches or blogs or social networks, people who relate to your message can find you and bring opportunities to you.

SBR: What unique challenges to microbusiness owners face when it comes to networking?
Lynch: The time factor. But where a microbusiness can do well in networking is no one is going be as passionate about your business as you. People will flock to you because of the energy and enthusiasm. Also, people know they're dealing with the owner and won't be shuffled off to junior assistant. Yes, it can take some time, but you also have a lot of selling points to take advantage of.

SBR: Any misconceptions about networking you'd like to dispel?
Lynch: A lot of people think it's about going to events and handing out business cards. That's probably the most horrible aspect of it. The misconception is that it's about pushing yourself at people. What I try to convey in the book is it's really about pulling people in, about making yourself known, liked, and trusted because of what they can read about you on your blog or Facebook page, or if they can hear you speak in public. It's being who you are, then pulling the people in who most connect with your message. True networkers try to learn about other people, rather than trying to figure out what they can push at people.

SBR: Share how you bounced back from your five-minute fiasco.
Lynch: I began to reconnect with people I already knew. A lot of us forget we have this rich treasure trove of contacts of people who know us and would be willing to help us if they knew we needed help. I sat down with a dozen old colleagues, bosses, and classmates, and told them about my new business. I never asked if they knew anyone who could hire me.

SBR: So how do you get help without asking for it?
Lynch: There are tricks for asking. It's important to recognize that people love to help, but you have to make it easy for them. Be specific. Part of it is asking at the level appropriate to your relationship. Your best friend may walk over glass for you, but you might have to ask for something smaller from someone you just met. Also, make it OK for people to say no to you. I know that sounds counterintuitive, but I would rather not get what I want and preserve a relationship for the long term. I want other people to feel comfortable, so if they have to say no, they don't have to hide from you. We, as women, are already pretty good at that.

The idea is you want people to open up to you during networking. Again, you don't want to put people on the spot. No one has a job in her back pocket for you. So I ask people for advice -- "I'm starting this new business, and I'd really love your advice on my marketing position because I'm not really sure I have it right."

SBR: How do you approach a large networking event, like a conference?
Lynch: After getting confidence from networking with the people I knew, I began going to events. I realized that arriving late when the room was full made it intimidating, so I'd get there early and talk to people who were there early, too -- usually the organizers or speakers. I found that I got a lot of great face time with people and was more comfortable being in a room with a few people than 200. Then what happens is the event builds up around you, with you in the center, instead of you being an outsider trying to breaking in. Another trick is to try to volunteer at events. Perhaps you can help check people in, pass out programs, or introduce a speaker.

SBR: Is it better to go to a networking event solo or with friend?
Lynch: If you have the relationship where you can't wait to brag about each other, that's really powerful. But it's not good if you're going to cling to each other and not meet anyone.

SBR: How do networking styles differ between women and men?
Lynch: I've noticed when women are networking with each other, there's more of a personal and social aspect of it. I think women have less trouble connecting but more trouble asking for help. We aren't used to asking for it for ourselves. We have no shame asking for our kids. But once you've built a relationship, you can learn to ask for help in a way that's authentic to you.

SBR: Aah, the "a" word!
Lynch: What turns people off about networking is if it feels fake. The book describes how to do it and not feel fake.

SBR: What do you suggest?
Lynch: If you're not aggressive, don't pretend you are. If your style is very much about building a relationship and talking about personal things, then be authentic to that. If you have to pretend to be someone, it's not going to last long. It's too tiring to keep up the façade. Also, if you're trying to get to the one person you think holds the key to your future, and whatever you're doing isn't not working, remember there's always another way. There's not just one person who can help us, which is why it's important to network. That's how you can find those other paths.

SBR: What's your biggest networking success?
Lynch: Having one! Whatever I want to do, I feel like I can do it. Whatever goal I have, whatever crazy project I want to take on, I can get to the people I need. That's a big success. I used to think networking was only about getting a job or if you're in sales. The support is really priceless.

SBR: Which is more valuable: in-person network or social networking?
Lynch: They serve different purposes. Face-to-face networking is still very important. You can tell almost off the bat if you're going to hit it off with someone. But it's time-consuming. Online networking is a great complement. I have people I know in person who I've extended my relationship with online. By the same token, you get to know a little bit about people who you haven't met. When you end up meeting in person, you can start at a higher level in the relationship. It takes the edge off of meeting people.

SBR: What are you online networks of choice?
Lynch: I'm an active user of Facebook and LinkedIn. LinkedIn is like my online rolodex. I look at it as my professional networking hub. With Facebook you can share a lot more about your business with multimedia capabilities. Even if you're a microbusinesses, you can do a video product demo or quick tip series.

SBR: All of which is time-consuming as well.
Lynch: What helps is if you have some kind of plan. I tell people to break up tasks into what you can do in 15-minute period -- that you can do at the beginning or end of the day, like accepting/requesting friend. I batch them in a separate folder, then when I'm on hold or waiting for calls, I look at them. That way you're not on it all the time, but are still being responsive.

SBR: You run a microbusiness. Do you have any help?
Lynch: The strategy business was just me, but I had other consultants to work with on big projects. In terms of support, I have a virtual assistant who gets my newsletter out and handles customer service issues. A few people wanted to team up in a formal way, but I like taking my business in different places without having to ask anybody.

SBR: What's the toughest part about running your own business?
Lynch: There are so many thing you want to do, especially when you network and see so many people doing great things. For me, it's constant prioritizing and reprioritizing, and sometimes having to put things on hold that I really want to work on. It's trying to resist the temptation of working on a lot of projects. That's really hard for me because I like to dabble.

SBR: How do you stay so positive?
Lynch: Self doubt creeps in all the time. I wouldn't be human if I said I can't believe I'm doing this. What helps me is to focus on results. I journal about amazing days. When there are times I'm not feeling motivated, it always helps to go back to the journal and recapture the excitement I felt when, for example, I got my book contract, or when I was on TV for the first time.

SBR: What's next for you?
Lynch: I'm focusing on building out additional programs for Smart Networking, to take it to the next level. I have a lot of speaking engagements coming up, and I may have another book in me. We'll see what happens.

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